Sacrifices

So, today I indulged in a a pedicure. Only my second in the twenty-three plus years that I've been alive. Then, my family took me out for some lovely cuisine at one of our favorite restaurants. I've decided that it is definitely worth me eating as well as possible in the next eight days before I leave for staging in Philadelphia. After all, there are a lot of things that I will be living without for the next two years, and I'm pretty sure that this indulgence is not selfish.

I had a tremendously thought provoking conversation with my sister, Tia, and my mom the other day. We were sipping iced tea and discussing the fact that I wanted to use her new panini grille to make goat cheese sandwiches before I leave. She said to me:

"Lib, it's like you're going to jail."

I said, "Explain."

"Just think of all the things you're giving up to do this thing. You can't take showers, you'll have no electricity, you can't have cheese or ice cream . . . "

I reminded her that in jail they have electricity and they take showers, as far as I know anyway. It will be a bummer to live without the electricity necessary to keep cheese and ice cream cold. (I laughed at the guy who sold me my CamelBak hydration system - he was explaining that the mouth is wide so you can put lots of ice cubes in it - I hope that wasn't rude.)

My sister continued: "You'll have no heat when it is cold and no fans or A.C. when it is hot. You're giving up everything!"

My mother chimed into the conversation: "Except what she wants to do with her life."

I was so appreciative of my mothers perspective. After all, she was the hardest to convince that Peace Corps service was right for me. She's come a LONG way since late December. She knows that this is important to me and now she's really supportive. My parents are even discussing coming for a visit - a big deal for my parents, whose only trip outside of North America was to visit me in Cape Town, South Africa.

For all of the sacrifices that I am making (particularly the sacrifice of being away from my family so long) I expect to be generously rewarded with a million amazing experiences. The way I see it, I can spend the next several days unselfishly rewarding myself with pedicures and goat cheese paninis.

25 days and counting

So, I work at a food Co-Op and I get to see everybody I know in my town, about twice a week. Everyone asks me: "When are you leaving?" and I usually know exactly how many days until June 5th. Today, the answer is 25. THAT IS INSANE!!! I can't believe it! I know this because I occasionally check on my future fellow PCV Marcus' blog http://rozbitsky.blogspot.com/, where he has a counter that counts down by the second until our staging event in Philadelphia. It is most helpful in keeping me (the world's best procrastinator) on track.

However, it could be responsible for my tossing and turning each night when I crawl into bed. I usually get comfortable and then pick up one of the eight books I am currently reading (all of which have some connection to either Zambia or the Peace Corps) and read until I drop the book on my face. Well, then I have to reach over to turn off the light and something about that motion wakes me up again, at least enough for my brain to cycle out of control about the fact that I am moving to Zambia in less than a month (much less in fact). I have to tell myself not to think about Zambia if I am going to get any sleep at all. What else is there to think about? Well, perhaps the things I am unfortunately going to miss this summer:

• My sister is pregnant and due to deliver what we think is a girl on September 8th. I am bummed to be missing the occasion, but perhaps it will make my mother less concerned about me, and more distracted by the excitement of her first grandchild!
• My rockstar friends - Grace Potter and the Nocturnals (check them out: http://gracepotter.com/) - are playing a bazillion music festivals I would love to be attending this summer. The only upside I can think of for that business is that by the time I return I can start saying "I knew them when. . . " Right now is just a little too soon to be impressive, although they are becoming HUGE, so you should all be going to see them whenever possible! Plug, plug, plug.
• Two of my "little" cousins are graduating from high school in June and going off to college. I am so proud! What a bummer to miss their respective big days.
• The project for which I have been sitting on a steering committee for the last several months is finally going to take off. The Straight Up and Safe program of the AIDS Project of Southern Vermont will start training outreach workers in June and they'll be hosting a bunch of open houses to launch the many projects that have been designed since the funding came through. I'll be sad to miss it, but they promise to update me often.
• I'm not even sure whether my family is planning our semi-annual vacation on Martha's Vineyard, but if they go, I'll miss it, and that will be a bummer.

Even with all of the potential occasions to miss and the inevitable sacrifices that come with Peace Corps service, I am so excited to get out there and do this really meaningful work. It will be wonderful and I can't wait. I'm just a little nervous about getting malaria and the prospect of fire ants by the thousands invading my mud-brick hut (I'm not kidding) in the middle of the night. . . and I'm worried about getting to sleep for the next 25 nights??? That alone should be a comforting thought, no fire ants will awaken me if I can finally get to sleep.